THE REVIVAL OF THE BLOG
Friday, July 17, 2009
Life's been good these few days as I've been sleeping really early these few days=)
My early is around 9.30-10am=)
I slept at 9.30 on tues.
I slept at 10.30 on wed.
I slept at 9.45 last night.
I felt really energetic and contented with life=)
And yes although I've done really badly for my exams.
I got a marginal E for GP and Maths, S for Chem, U for econs( 1 mark to E!), and D for Physics.
Such horrible results in my life. Failed 2 subjects terribly.
And DONKEY for Physics???
OMGOODNESS.
But really, these results really serve as a deep reflection for me to wake up and really change my way of studying.
Today's class lunch is awesome.
I have really AWESOME classmates=)
With barely 80 days to PROMOS...I'll really need to BUCK UP on my results=)
¶ 7:39 PM 0 Comments
Sunday, July 12, 2009
Today is an inspiring day.
Like a cup of warm tea that scalded my tongue, which wake me up from by intoxicated state for the past few months.
And wow! One semester has gone, and I find myself falling deeper and deeper.
"I feel so useless".
Elaine said that today.
"I feel even more useless".
I'll say that now.
I feel so worthless.
I cnt make it in academics, and not even in CCA.
Xinfang is in canoe, which require heavy commitments and she's in exco and she still strive for good results.
Elaine is in cricket, a sport CCA which require physical effort and she's topping her class.
And I cannot make it in academics, failing chemistry and getting 31 over 70, and I know I failed econs too.
AJ's papers are not difficult as compared to other JCs.
Thats why I'm worrying.
I'm doing badly on academics now.
And I have no back-up plan of using CCA for university admission.
I must be stressed.
I must be worrying.
I must get into university.
Reason?
Most probably of my sister's failure that really impacted me really greatly.
Imagine yourself in my shoes.
Carrying everything on my shoulders.
EVERYONE'S EXPECTATIONS.
They expected me to do well, strive well, excell well.
FRANKLY SPEAKING, I JUST WANT TO KNOW WHAT I WANT TO BE IN THE FUTURE.
A JOB THAT SATISFY MY MONETARY AND NON-MONETARY ASPECTS.
PLEASE. ¶ 7:49 PM 0 Comments
Like a cup of warm tea that scalded my tongue, which wake me up from by intoxicated state for the past few months.
And wow! One semester has gone, and I find myself falling deeper and deeper.
"I feel so useless".
Elaine said that today.
"I feel even more useless".
I'll say that now.
I feel so worthless.
I cnt make it in academics, and not even in CCA.
Xinfang is in canoe, which require heavy commitments and she's in exco and she still strive for good results.
Elaine is in cricket, a sport CCA which require physical effort and she's topping her class.
And I cannot make it in academics, failing chemistry and getting 31 over 70, and I know I failed econs too.
AJ's papers are not difficult as compared to other JCs.
Thats why I'm worrying.
I'm doing badly on academics now.
And I have no back-up plan of using CCA for university admission.
I must be stressed.
I must be worrying.
I must get into university.
Reason?
Most probably of my sister's failure that really impacted me really greatly.
Imagine yourself in my shoes.
Carrying everything on my shoulders.
EVERYONE'S EXPECTATIONS.
They expected me to do well, strive well, excell well.
FRANKLY SPEAKING, I JUST WANT TO KNOW WHAT I WANT TO BE IN THE FUTURE.
A JOB THAT SATISFY MY MONETARY AND NON-MONETARY ASPECTS.
PLEASE. ¶ 7:49 PM 0 Comments
Friday, July 10, 2009
Realised that I've been dreaming a lot and dare not put words and thoughts into actions.
Afterall, daydreams are sweet.
However, when u return to reality, you realise that reality is hurting.
Yesterday is stressed to the max over PW.
Been thinking about this and that, this and that.
Just realised that from the start of the year, I've missed 3 realy valuable opportunities of my JC life.
Hence, I've missed more opportunities that are attached to these opportunities.
The regret still remains.
Today was mugging in school after lessons and national library-ed+ chinese opera institure-ed at bugis on own because all my friends in AJ have sth on.
The result is HORRENDOUS.
I lost my way and walked continuously for more than 1 hour just to find the stupid institute.
I kept walking around the library for fear that I'll lost it while lookign for the institute.
Then I was frustrated and I walked further.
In the END, I LOST MY WAY.
Really angry with myself for being dumb with no direction sense, and not printing the map beforehand.
Then I landed at some Indian place where I've never see before.
Luckily, I able to find a familiar place in the end, and I was so tired and hungry and decided to hop on the bus to home instead.
So I did not find the Institute and the books in the Library IN THE END.
And to MR/ MRS/ MISS SPEECH DAY LETTER, please stop playing hide and seek with me and please appear. I need you urgently or I'm in deep trouble. Please.
Only if angels exist, can they grant me wishes please?ps: Chinese opera institute is at Tanjong Pagar, not at Bugis.
I think the map I saw on net is not updated.
¶ 8:20 PM 0 Comments
Wednesday, July 8, 2009
I'll change the template again, and put back my links and tagboard and music asap=)
Today is another experimental day of public transport with Jacelyn=)
Today is bus 851-bus 171-lrt to home sweet home
Yesterday was mrt to yishun-bus 171-lrt to home sweet home
To school is lrt-MRT FROM CCK TO YCK.
All the methods are time-consuming, and require lotsa of waiting time for buses.
A mixture of feelings today.
While taking bus 171, a guy siting 2 rows behind us was sniffing glue.
The second time I turned back, his facial expression ( totally immersed in the glue-sniffing) is totally appalling.
YUCKS.
And he alighted at the next stop when he realised I was looking at him.
I thought he wanted to throw the glue at my face when he stood up.
And I was shocked to know that a primary school friend of mine, was pregnant last year, and gave birth to the child, and the child is 3months old. And she broke up with that bf.
THE SAME AGE AS ME.
Totally shocking.
The first thought I had was,
" What about her future?"
Anw, struggling with mountains of leftover GP hw.
6 more article reviews, 2 more essay outines, 2 compres.
¶ 8:38 PM 0 Comments
Today is another experimental day of public transport with Jacelyn=)
Today is bus 851-bus 171-lrt to home sweet home
Yesterday was mrt to yishun-bus 171-lrt to home sweet home
To school is lrt-MRT FROM CCK TO YCK.
All the methods are time-consuming, and require lotsa of waiting time for buses.
A mixture of feelings today.
While taking bus 171, a guy siting 2 rows behind us was sniffing glue.
The second time I turned back, his facial expression ( totally immersed in the glue-sniffing) is totally appalling.
YUCKS.
And he alighted at the next stop when he realised I was looking at him.
I thought he wanted to throw the glue at my face when he stood up.
And I was shocked to know that a primary school friend of mine, was pregnant last year, and gave birth to the child, and the child is 3months old. And she broke up with that bf.
THE SAME AGE AS ME.
Totally shocking.
The first thought I had was,
" What about her future?"
Anw, struggling with mountains of leftover GP hw.
6 more article reviews, 2 more essay outines, 2 compres.
¶ 8:38 PM 0 Comments
Monday, July 6, 2009
Iwas rather shocked by myself that throughout the whole holiday, I did not blog much though.
This holiday is horrible.
HW is really really an ongoing process forever and ever in JC life.
I really hope for heavier commitments actually.
CCA is really not of a burden as I don't really feel wanted in the cca.
Like nth much will be changed even w/o me.
Perhaps I shld have joined a smaller-scale cca with fewer members.
At least I'll feel some sort of belonging.
And I just feel that there's just some sort of politics going on within.
And I feel that whenever I tried to help, "they" just feel that I'm gg to snatch some sort of accomplishments from them.
Afterall, "they" are calling the shots now.
Lets push all unhappiness aside now.
Holiday is still quite of a pleasure actually.
I met up with my dearest friends for quite many times this holidays=)
Class outing is not bad too=)
And then 3rd week, I lost track of what I'm doing and started to procrastinate and stop doing hw.
4th week was sleepover at aunt's and mass mugging starts.
"A JC HOLIDAY IS NEVER A HOLIDAY'
believe it.
Papers mostly screwed.
GP is most alright for me among other papers because compared to others, I actually put in most effort in it.
Econs is damn screwed.
I don't really know what I did for case study, and essay is just a pile of shit.
Chem is quite alright.
Math is SCREWED TOTALLY.
lost 40 marks for not completing questions already.
Should have believe in vivian that we cnt finish math though its 3hours=(
Was too over-confident=(
Physics was though ok, but I felt that my physics concepts are no longer at my fingertips=(
Realised that was really too reliant on Mr Loh in the past=(
Without tuition now, I feel so crippled=(
After physics, was LUNCHIE WITH CLASSMATES, then TRANSFORMERS with vivi lim and jacelyn, and stalked min yi to her hse for BRIDE WARS and 'concert' began! haha!!
Tonight is ladies' night=)
The 2 girls beside and behind me are already KNOCKED OUT.
PERSEVERE FOR THE NIGHT!!!
The next night may be 4 months later only=(
after PROMOS and PW. ¶ 1:32 AM 0 Comments
This holiday is horrible.
HW is really really an ongoing process forever and ever in JC life.
I really hope for heavier commitments actually.
CCA is really not of a burden as I don't really feel wanted in the cca.
Like nth much will be changed even w/o me.
Perhaps I shld have joined a smaller-scale cca with fewer members.
At least I'll feel some sort of belonging.
And I just feel that there's just some sort of politics going on within.
And I feel that whenever I tried to help, "they" just feel that I'm gg to snatch some sort of accomplishments from them.
Afterall, "they" are calling the shots now.
Lets push all unhappiness aside now.
Holiday is still quite of a pleasure actually.
I met up with my dearest friends for quite many times this holidays=)
Class outing is not bad too=)
And then 3rd week, I lost track of what I'm doing and started to procrastinate and stop doing hw.
4th week was sleepover at aunt's and mass mugging starts.
"A JC HOLIDAY IS NEVER A HOLIDAY'
believe it.
Papers mostly screwed.
GP is most alright for me among other papers because compared to others, I actually put in most effort in it.
Econs is damn screwed.
I don't really know what I did for case study, and essay is just a pile of shit.
Chem is quite alright.
Math is SCREWED TOTALLY.
lost 40 marks for not completing questions already.
Should have believe in vivian that we cnt finish math though its 3hours=(
Was too over-confident=(
Physics was though ok, but I felt that my physics concepts are no longer at my fingertips=(
Realised that was really too reliant on Mr Loh in the past=(
Without tuition now, I feel so crippled=(
After physics, was LUNCHIE WITH CLASSMATES, then TRANSFORMERS with vivi lim and jacelyn, and stalked min yi to her hse for BRIDE WARS and 'concert' began! haha!!
Tonight is ladies' night=)
The 2 girls beside and behind me are already KNOCKED OUT.
PERSEVERE FOR THE NIGHT!!!
The next night may be 4 months later only=(
after PROMOS and PW. ¶ 1:32 AM 0 Comments
Friday, July 3, 2009
There's lotsa for me to say, but really, FATIGUE IS OVERCOMING ME.
TODAY IS A DAMN GREAT DAY.
being abusing the word "damn" lately. NO NO NO.
But today is real fun with AJ clique.
saw the another side of my classmates recently=)
The good side=)
Alright, long post tml, got to go before the clock strikes 12!
p.s I'M NOT CINDERELLA ¶ 11:44 PM 0 Comments
TODAY IS A DAMN GREAT DAY.
being abusing the word "damn" lately. NO NO NO.
But today is real fun with AJ clique.
saw the another side of my classmates recently=)
The good side=)
Alright, long post tml, got to go before the clock strikes 12!
p.s I'M NOT CINDERELLA ¶ 11:44 PM 0 Comments
